I got chris browned last night
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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