I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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