So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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