Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
