3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
