Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
ugly people sure do ruin things
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize