Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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