Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!