I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
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while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
should my penis look like a turkey
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
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The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.