So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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