i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
he shaved USA in his pubs
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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