so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
