I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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