dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
