i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
How naked do you want me to be?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
