Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
