either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
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