is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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