i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
