I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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