She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
