i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Randomize
