You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
