my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
