I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
