I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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