he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I need to stop coming to work sober
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
