I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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