before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
