I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
