Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
