we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
He better not be in your backpack
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Randomize
