Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Randomize
