goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
my shit smells like andre
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so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
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TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?