Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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