From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize