maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize