I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize