We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
There are leaves in my underwear?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
