Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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