Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
