I never want to see another naked old woman again.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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