Pants 0. Shit 1.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
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