sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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