We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
