is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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