I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize