If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
