Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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