i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
