I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm experimenting with sincerity
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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